Silence Can Be Golden

April 14, 2026 1 Comment

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The three men took turns at a congregational meeting, holding a wireless microphone, lambasting me before the congregation for my “weak” leadership that I displayed in asking a paid youth pastor to step down. They felt I had yielded to the complaints of a few, when I felt I had judged the situation rightly in asking him to step down.

It was a very painful meeting. I sat in the front row of the sanctuary taking it all in; being punched and pummeled by their words would be a more accurate description. I chose, by the grace of God, to remain essentially silent, resisting the temptation to defend myself.

The three men and their wives left the church. The storm passed and within a couple of years two of the couples returned to the church. The one man told me, “When I was speaking in front of the congregation at the meeting, I could see it in their eyes that I had lost them.” For the remaining time of my ministry at the church this man would often pray for me before a service, particularly before the Christmas or Easter services, sensing my anxiety at trying to deliver God’s message on such crucial occasions. I can also say, thanks be to God, that I retired from the church on good terms with the other two men as well.

We can do no better than to follow Jesus’ example after His arrest in the Garden of Gethsemane. “And the high priest stood up and said, ‘Have you no answer to make? What is it that these men testify against you?’ But Jesus remained silent” (Matthew 26:62-63a). “When Herod saw Jesus, he was very glad, for he had long desired to see him, because he had heard about him, and he was hoping to see some sign done by him. So he questioned him at some length, but he made no answer” (Luke 23:8-9). “And Pilate again asked him, ‘Have you no answer to make? See how many charges they bring against you.’But Jesus made no further answer, so that Pilate was amazed” (Mark 15:4-5).

Before the high priest, King Herod, and Pontius Pilate, before all three, Jesus remained silent, fulfilling the prophecy of Him in Isaiah 53:7, “He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth.”

As pastors, if we are seeking to do the Lord’s will, we can count on Him to defend us when we are falsely accused. We don’t have to defend ourselves. He has our back!

C.H. Spurgeon says in Morning by Morning: Daily Devotional Reading, the April 2 devotional, “The ambiguous and the false, the unworthy and the scornful, will before long overthrow and discredit themselves, and therefore those who are true can afford to be quiet, finding silence to be their wisdom.”

Yes, there are times when we should respond. At such times a reminder from the book of Proverbs is often in order. “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). But more often than we think, silence is golden.

All Scripture references are from the English Standard Version

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Growing Older Gracefully

April 10, 2026 Leave a comment

Growing Older Gracefully is a month’s worth of short chapters on how we can successfully navigate the senior years with its challenges of the aging process. Engaging stories and illustrations are combined with Scripture references which anchor the subjects covered to God’s truth. Growing Older Gracefully is a resounding affirmation that it’s possible to experience this stage of life as a fulfilling journey! It would make a great study/discussion resource for a seniors’ group or an adult Sunday School class.

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An Easter Thought

April 2, 2026 Leave a comment

Here’s a brief (under 4 minutes) thought for Easter. If you’re like me, you appreciate what others are saying or have written about a major subject, like Easter. It can help prime the pump of our own preparation for such an important event.

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My New Book

January 24, 2026 Leave a comment

My latest book, The Divine Profile, is a small 100-page volume that contains 31 devotional thoughts on 29 of God’s attributes. Here’s how it’s described on Amazon… “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us,” wrote A. W. Tozer in his classic book Knowledge of the Holy. So, let’s think about God. What is God like? How would we describe God? The Divine Profile is a month’s worth of short reflections on 29 of God’s attributes. A study of God’s attributes opens up the message of the Bible and provides the foundation for successfully facing the challenges of life.

For a pastor, the short chapters can stimulate further thoughts on the attributes. It also would be a great read for lay people. Most books on God’s attributes are quite long and/or deep. These readings are heavy on illustrations and application. The paperback is $7 and the Kindle download is $1. Both are available at this LINK on Amazon.

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Martin Lloyd-Jones

August 30, 2025 Leave a comment

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May 15, 2025 Leave a comment

Andrew Murray gives all pastors/preachers a good reminder in the following statement. “Being in Christ and living in the power of the Holy Spirit is a life to be lived, not just a tool that we can use.”

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Relax, Results Can’t Be Orchestrated

March 9, 2025 Leave a comment

Growing up on an Iowa farm I helped my dad till the soil, plant, cultivate, and then harvest the crops. We put much effort into growing crops but never made them grow.

I recall us having planted a field of corn east of the farm buildings. For days all you could see when looking at the field was black soil. Then, about a week after planting, I looked east at the sun coming up over the horizon and the sun’s glimmering reflection on rows of small spikes of emerging corn. We had done nothing after planting the corn seed. It had come up all by itself.

This memory reminds me of a parable Jesus told, recorded only in the Gospel of Mark which has clear application to pastoral ministry. “He also said, ‘This is what the kingdom of God is like. A man scatters seed on the ground. Night and day, whether he sleeps or gets up, the seed sprouts and grows, though he does not know how. All by itself the soil produces grain—first the stalk, then the head, then the full kernel in the head. As soon as the grain is ripe, he puts the sickle to it, because the harvest has come’” (Mark 4:26-29).

J. C. Ryle comments on this passage, “Let us observe this truth also, for it is deeply instructive. It is humbling, no doubt, to ministers and teachers of others. The highest abilities, the most powerful preaching, the most diligent working cannot command success. God alone can give spiritual life. But it is a truth at the same time which supplies an admirable antidote to over-anxiety and despondency. Our principal work is to sow the seed. That done, we may wait with faith and patience for the result. We may go to bed at night and [get] up by day and leave our work with the Lord. He alone can, and if He thinks fit, He will give success.” (Expository Thoughts on The Gospel of Mark, J. C. Ryle, Aneko Press)

As a pastor, I often saw myself as a farmer. My farm was my local church. Like a farmer, I planted, tilled, watered, and weeded in many metaphorical ways. Like the farmer, the results were up to God. This thought, when embraced, can lighten a pastor’s burden. It did for me.

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Not Necessarily Succesful, But Faithful

October 28, 2024 Leave a comment

A quote from J. C. Ryle appropriate for pastors laboring in a church…

“The honest master pays his laborers according to the work they do and not according to the crops that grow on his land. Our Master in heaven will deal with all His servants at the last day in like manner. He knows that success is not in their hands. He knows that they cannot change hearts. He will reward them according to their labor and not according to the fruits which have resulted from their labor. It is not the good and successful servant but the good and faithful servant to whom He will say, “Enter into the joy of your master” (Matthew 25:21).”

“Expository Thoughts on the Gospel of Mark: A Commentary [Updated]” by J. C. Ryle

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The Perfect Motivation for Being a Merciful Pastor

October 8, 2024 Leave a comment

Pastors are expected to be nice to everyone in their church. Who wants a nasty pastor? Sometimes people who didn’t attend church told me the reason is that churches are filled with hypocrites who act badly. Sound familiar? And they think this is news to us pastors? No one knows better than the pastor how imperfect the church is! I was tempted to respond, “That’s okay, one more hypocrite who sometimes acts badly won’t be a problem for us at all.” But I bite my tongue; I don’t want to be nasty.

Most of us have heard, and undoubtedly used, the phrase, “Churches aren’t nursing homes for saints but hospitals for sinners.” If churches are “hospitals for sinners” then it wouldn’t be a stretch to suggest that the “doctors,” are we pastors, and that we are ill ourselves and in need of further healing ourselves. This fact, I came to find out, in my ministry, was the key for me being a merciful pastor.

Sometimes the hurt I experienced as a pastor was quite intense. Keep in mind that most of the time most of the parishioners were wonderful and exhibited the love of Christ. But sometimes, with a few people, not so much.

Jesus taught us that we’re to love our enemies. That would mean anyone who hurts us, including those in our church. But it can be difficult to love our enemies, especially those enemies within our church family. Oh, we might be able to fake it outwardly if we’re a good actor, and make it look like we’re loving our enemy. Down deep, however, we’re likely still seething with anger and unforgiveness. If I had to grit my teeth with those who mistreated me over the years, trying to love them, I’d have ground down my teeth to the gums long ago.

There’s a better way, I found, the only way to truly love our enemies. Jesus gave us that way when He said, “Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful” (Luke 6:36). The way to be able to show those in our congregation mercy (forgiving them) is to focus on how we, as the pastor, also need God’s mercy (forgiveness) in our own lives. I know, we might argue that we’ve never done something so despicable as the person who has hurt us. True, we may have not done the same despicable thing as that person, but if we’re honest, we must admit that we’ve found our own creative ways to be despicable.

It’s when we acknowledge we have had to depend on God being merciful to us that we can then, in turn, find the will and strength to be merciful toward those who have hurt us. Reflecting back to those 40 years of ministry where I encountered some hurtful people, I can testify that focusing on God being merciful to me was the key to being merciful to those hurtful people in my congregation.

When I found it difficult to forgive and show mercy, I learned I had to turn the focus onto myself and how I had to count on the constant mercy and forgiveness of God myself. Then, by the help of my merciful God, I could give the mercy and forgiveness to others that I’d been given by God.

“We love because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19).

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Pastoral Judging

September 10, 2024 Leave a comment

Looking back, I could be judgmental as a pastor. I recall taking my afternoon coffee break at the Barnes and Noble coffee shop when an older pastor came in to buy a book. We had met before so we exchanged a few words. He informed me that he was retiring soon. I sensed anticipation about the coming change. He looked tired, his demeanor like Eeyore’s, the stuffed donkey in the Winnie the Pooh stories. I thought to myself, I hope I don’t lose enthusiasm for being a pastor like this guy, that I keep going for years to come.

I don’t know how long after this, probably not many years, a church consultant asked me if, after a lifetime of pastoring the church, I was going to be able to hand over the reins of pastoral leadership to my heir apparent in a couple of years. I replied, “I’m wondering if I can hang on that long.” My response surprised me. Several factors played into it, but it turned out that I retired a year earlier than I had planned. I shouldn’t have been so harsh with my judgment of the tired and nearly retired pastor at Barnes and Noble.

I was determined, as we went through the process of pastoral transition, that we wouldn’t make a mess of it like some large, high-profile churches had done in the recent past. We would do it better. In retrospect, it didn’t go as planned. I’m comforted in knowing that God uses unfolding events for His glory and for the good of people even if those events went other than the way we wanted. Still, I shouldn’t have been so judgmental of those other churches.

I think it’s an occupational hazard of pastors to enthusiastically assert that others aren’t doing ministry as well, as Biblically, or as successfully as we are. What are we modeling for our people when we take such a view? Is our own heart in a good and humble place when we make such judgments?

I know, there are times when we need to help our congregation see false teaching and wrong practices of some high-profile ministries or local ministries. We’re also called, as pastors, to judge the qualifications someone has, or doesn’t have, for a ministry position in the church. But I wonder if we don’t sometimes fall to the temptation of passing judgment when the primary motivation, if truth be told, is for the building up of our own ego, that we’re doing it better.

The last thing we want to do is to emulate the prayer of the Pharisee in one of Jesus’ parables, the “bad guy” as Jesus portrays him in the parable, who prayed while standing near a tax collector, “God, I thank you that I am not like other people – robbers, evildoers, adulterers – or even like this tax collector” (Luke 18:11). The prayer of the tax collector, the other main character in the parable, who turns out to be the good guy, was a humble prayer of confession. We’ve all preached the parable and know that the Pharisee’s prayer was the wrong prayer to pray. Yet, do we ever think, say, or even pray something similar, “Lord, thank you that we aren’t like that church!” and then list, at least in our minds, why we’re so much better?

Yes, we have differences with other churches. Some of those differences are major. If those differences concern major Biblical truths then we’re to be vigilant, identifying false doctrine and wrong practices. But there are also cases where there has been historic disagreement among serious Bible-believing people through the years. Often, this has to do with church structure and practices.

I’m reminded of the exchange between the apostle John and Jesus. “’Teacher,’ said John, ‘we saw someone driving out demons in your name and we told him to stop, because he was not one of us.’ ‘Do not stop him,’ Jesus said. ‘For no one who does a miracle in my name can in the next moment say anything bad about me, for whoever is not against us is for us’” (Mark 9:38-40).

We should pray for great discernment when it comes to judging someone else’s ministry. Is their ministry for or against Christ? Are we being called upon by God to judge? Yes, there will be times when we’re called to pass judgment. There will also be times when it’s not our place to judge.

This blog is called A Pastor’s Heart. The issue of right judgment and wrong judgment should be of great importance to a pastor’s heart!

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